Welcome to the Offensive Line Practice Chat Room!

EarthwermKurt: Seriously?

TheBarwisAidMan: YES. SERIOUSLY.

EarthwermKurt: You want me to run through that?

TheBarwisAidMan: QUIT GABBING YOU HUMAN SIZED SACK OF VAGINAS AND DRAG YOUR WATERBED OF AN ASS THROUGH THAT TUNNEL

EarthwermKurt: It’s only 16 inches tall

TheBarwisAidMan: TO IMPROVE YOUR PAD LEVEL

EarthwermKurt: There is a wolf with construction paper wings stapled on its back

TheBarwisAidMan: IT IS A GRIFFIN

EarthwermKurt: I am 99% sure that is a wolf with fake wings.

TheBarwisAidMan: IT IS A GRIFFIN – A MAJESTIC CREATURE  SUMMOUNED FROM THE DEPTHS OF THE UNDERWORLD TO STRIKE FEAR INTO YOUR CLOGGED HEART AND GUARD THE TREASURE OF OFFENSIVE LINE GREATNESS WHILE MAINTAINING A MONOGAMOUS RELATIONSHIP WITH A FEMALE GRIFFIN THAT IS HONORED EVEN IN DEATH

EarthwermKurt: Griffins are lions with the wings of eagles. They are mythical.

TheBarwisAidMan: STOP CHALLENGING THE CONSTRUCTION OF THE COURSE AND REACH FOR YOUR DESTINY YOU LUMPY POTATO SACK OF BACON GREASE AND DING DONGS

EarthwermKurt: It’s not even possible! There’s razor wire on the inside of the tunnel! Wolves! I’m pretty sure I saw O’Neill step on a landmine!

TheBarwisAidMan: PATRICK HAS COMPLETED THE TEST WITH THE FORTITUDE OF A TRUE CHAMPION

EarthwermKurt: Honestly, I don’t care. This is stupid. School is hard enough without dealing with this shit. I can’t help it guys like Patrick can handle it.

ohMeohMYohMA: Whoa, hold on, what do you mean … you guys?

BarnumandBlockum: Yeah, you got something to say Werm?

EarthwermKurt: I’m just sayin, you guys are good at this and I’m not

BarnumandBlockum: There you go AGAIN. YOU GUYS. You got a fucking issue with the color of my skin you roly poly piece of gelataned pig fat

ohMeohMYohMA: Naw now hold on, maybe he didn’t mean it that way, maybe we should give him the benefit of the doubt before we start stomping this bitch

EarthwermKurt: dudes

BarnumandBlockum: AW HELL NO YOU DIDN’T

ohMeohMYohMA: dudes? do we look like your dudes, brah?

BarnumandBlockum: first you insult us, now you are trying to be my dude? racist fatty

EarthwermKurt: Come on, I voted for Obama

BarnumandBlockum: Oh, so I’m a dem just because I’m black? What if i happen to think that the free market should be allowed to operate freely and that traditional american values are under assault from all directions? Huh? what then?

EarthwermKurt: I eat at Popeye’s

ohMeohMYohMA: no fucking way

BarnumandBlockum: I only eat chickens that I raise myself, and I eat grilled because I follow our nutritional plan unlike some fat ass crackers around here

EarthwermKurt: I watch Oprah

TheBarwisAidMan: THAT IS THE MOST RIDICULOUS THING YOU HAVE SAID YET

TheBarwisAidMan: DO YOU CRY DURING THE SHOW? DO YOUR TEARS REEK OF PROCESSED SUGAR AND GRAVY?

EarthwermKurt: I cried when MJ died.

BarnumandBlockum: really?

EarthwermKurt: I thought he was a tortured soul trapped in a media created prison of his own talent and false accusations

EarthwermKurt: His music, ambiguous racial and gender identity, and human struggles brought together people of disparate backgrounds across the globe to marvel at his forever young voice and physics defying dance ability

EarthwermKurt: Sometimes I weep, alone, in my dorm room and listen to Dirty Diana on repeat.

ohMeohMYohMA: give me a hug

BarnumandBlockum: bring it in here

TheBarwisAidMan: LET’S GO TO CEDAR POINT