Wolverine Liberation Army

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Week 8: lolfail

Week 9: Hope MIIICH wins!

Hathachips

Michigan Offense Prediction: Minor will get some snaps but only run using his one healthy leg. He will be hopping just below a 4.4 40 speed, just as Barwis taught him this week in practice. Carlos Brown and Mike Shaw will combine for over 250 yds rushing because of how piss poor the run D is for the Zooks (lasting the B10). Tate will look like his old self again, throw a couple TD’s and rush for 1. Nard Dawg will not tie his shoes.

Offense Key Player/s: Every single receiver on the team, I picked Gerg Matthews last week and he was the only one who decided to catch the ball. NO DROPS!!! BOOK IT!

Michigan Defense Prediction: The MICH defense will have a much easier task this Saturday because Illinoise has no real dominating facet to their offense other than this “Juice” character. He is the leading passer (963 yds 4tds) and 2nd best rusher (277 yds) behind LeShoure (285). MICH shuts down Juice early, he throws a couple of picks, fumbles on a scramble and poops his jorts 4 times (he wears them under his pants for good loluck).

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Online Host: ***Welcome to INDIAN REMOVAL Chat***

PatrickKanein09:So anyway, Winnie, you guys have to back the fuck off our land. Does Chief Blackhawk have to rain thunder on you?

OleFussnFeathers: Keep talking, red-man. Can I interest you in some blankets?

ChampaignDreamsJuiceBudget: Ah hah!  ‘Tis I! Your most formidable rival!

PatrickKanein09: Wut?

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We’re back after a short hiatus. Look for a win come Saturday. I believe we briefly touch on Illinois, but expect lots of “wingin’ it”.

**The following podcast is intended for comedic purposes only. Topics and people discussed are not based on e-fact. This podcast series is strictly non-commercial.**

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Early this morning I had a dream that I was on Jeopardy. I was going against Danny Bonaduce and one of the Kardashians, and since all the topics magically revolved around college football and those two are dumb as fucking rocks, I was kicking ass.

Then it was Final Jeopardy time. Alex Trebek offered the final clue:

• David Molk
• Junior Hemingway
• Donovan Warren
• Brandon Minor
• Tate Forcier
• Martavious Odoms

I responded with “what are ‘guys that when they limp make me piss my pants, suck on Krispy Kreme glazed fruit pies, and ponder the depth chart black magic powers of Mike Barwis?’, Alex” I was correct (obviously, since this is a dream and it’s all about me and my own negbanged thoughts). I won a trip to the Amalfi Coast and a consequence-free night with Kate Beckinsale and Rick Leach. Then I woke up to the first cold rain of the season for Charleston, and this all made sense.

Before the season began, 6-6 was the goal with Notre Dame offering the best opportunity to “jump up” to 7-5. Everything has gone according to plan, and with the bonus win over ND, 7-5 remains the goal. There is no magic bullet single offseason that can transform a bad defense into an iron curtain, nor can one or two true freshmen QBs transform a cartoonishly horrific offense into a shredder. Revolutions take time, and this is no exception.

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